Knock, Knock...

Last night my WW guru Rosie, who is just fabulous, asked me what's going to make this time different from any other time I've tried to lose weight. You know, I had to really think about it. When I first started the program a couple of weeks ago my first reaction was not to tell anyone. It would just be my little secret. Eventually my friends would figure it out because I would have lost a ton of weight and, best of all, I would have done it all by myself. What was I thinking?  I was thinking that if I didn't tell anybody I wouldn't have to be accountable if I was a failure. Everything I put in my mouth wouldn't be judged. If I don't admit it then it must not be true. I had to really take a leap of faith and put it all out there. So what did I do?  I started a blog. At first I only told a few close friends and family. I figured if I failed again, only a few people would know about it, but after a few submissions something changed. My friends were giving me this wonderful feedback about how much they enjoyed my writing and how I was inspiring them in their own lives. It was such a confidence booster. I realized that someone's always willing help you open that door, but you have to knock or no one knows you're there. I wasn't use to asking for help. I have a great circle of friends and family I just simply didn't know how to ask. The other night at the meeting when I was telling my story about taking care of my family and finally taking time to take of myself, they all applauded. It was really overwhelming. I felt like they embraced what I was talking about and I felt safe.

So here's a little story that really explains best why I think it's going to work this time. I went to Hawaii a few years ago and my friends wanted to go snorkeling. I had never done it before and was really looking forward to hanging out in the water checking out all the amazing fish.  My friends were really patient with me. One of them held my hand while I tried to float and stick my face under water. I'm claustrophobic and this was just too much for me. We tried and tried, but I couldn't do it! I was about to give up and then I had a little conversation with myself. I said "do I really want to do this?" I really thought about it.  Finally, I understood that it wasn't fear standing in my way,  it was me.  I thought "yes! I really want to do this!" So I put the mask back on and went for it! It was truly incredible and I'm so glad I did it. It was an empowering experience and a lesson I often use.

So why is this time different? I'm opening myself up for success, not failure. I feel the love from perfect strangers and I like it! I comfort myself with friends, not food. I give myself time to feel hungry and know that it will pass. I plan my meals, but I don't obsess. I knock on doors and know that someone will answer, but most importantly, it's something I really want to do it.

How did I do last week? I lost 4 lbs, not bad for a somebody who was having a tough go at it. My grand total is 7 lbs. so far. I'm not just feeling thinner, but I'm also feeling the weight of world finally lifting off my shoulders.